Sunday, August 12, 2007
Things I've learnt about being a pregnant lesbian
- Telling people is more awkward than I'd expected - some just don't care (mainly those who've never had babies and never thought about wanting them), some get really excited (mainly those who are already parents and happy to be so). But because I don't know who is having/has had difficulties trying to conceive, and because I remember how painful it was to hear people at work discussing the various pregnancies in the office around the time of Cagney's miscarriage, I'm always worried about how to present the news, without seeming too excited or expecting a positive reaction.
- Only one person has responded with "can I ask how?". Most people find it perfectly normal that a lesbian should get pregnant. What a progressive society we live in!
- Many people (mainly men) drop their eyes direct to my belly, looking for a bump. Telling them it's only 6cm or 10cm long only means they keep sneaking glances over the next few weeks, and commenting "still not showing then?"
- Once told, many people take it as a cue to recall all the horror stories they've heard about giving birth:
"my friend ripped all the way to her arsehole, couldn't sit down for weeks, hasn't ad a decent sex life since..."
This is always from people who have never given birth themselves. And it is always unsolicited, unwanted advice. PLEASE STOP! - Others take it as the cue to tell me how I'll change:
"You'll get all emotional and start hugging complete strangers"
(I'm not a particularly tactile person)
"I don't think so"
"Yes you will! My cousin..."
"No - really - I don't see that my boundaries will undergo some tectonic shift such that I want to start rubbing my flesh against that of complete strangers"
"Oh. Well, let's just wait and see" (knowing wink) - Being pregnant is much harder work physically than I had ever imagined in the early stages.
- You can be 16 weeks pregnant, not showing, and still have outgrown all your clothes (I've found this really upsetting, which is odd, given how little attention I generally give my appearance).
- I think all maternity bra designers are men. How else would many styles stop at sizes smaller than I was pre-pregnancy? Why do they worry more about bragging that their bras are "100% cotton" and not whether they offer expanding and overly sensitive bosoms any support at all? Tip: if you weren't flat chested before pregnancy, find a comfortable sports bra and ignore the horrible maternity range with their pink bows, total lack of support and skinny shoulder straps that leave welts across your shoulders.
- All the books assume your parter is a man. Looks like authors/editors live outside that progressive society my friends/work colleagues inhabit.
- Um, there should be a number 10 here. But I can't think any more. Those pregnancy hormones mean I keep forgetting everything... Cagney, help me out?
Wednesday, August 01, 2007
12 week scan
Heres a scan picture of baby at 12 weeks and 4 days. Hope you can all see it clearly!!
